WORST. PREVIEWS. EVER.

So I went to see The Simpsons Movie over the weekend. It was grand. But the previews before the movie were, perhaps, the worst ever. If you have yet to go see The Simpsons Movie, I've attempted to create a The Simpsons Movie Previews Experience. Just click the movie above. Now, there were certainly more previews than I've included ... but these three stuck out:

1) DADDY DAY CAMP: Yeah, that's right. A sequel to Daddy Day Care. But the fact that they bill this movie as being "From the studio that brought you Daddy Day Care" should tell you all you need to know. They might as well say "From the media company that retains the legal rights to produce a sequel to Daddy Day Care." Because as far as I can tell, ABSOLUTELY NOBODY involved in that first movie have anything to do with the second. Not that I saw the first. It looked horrible. But now they've made a sequel. Starring Cuba Gooding, Jr. And I gotta say, if most trailers can make even crappy movies look funny ... this has got to be one God-awful piece of trash.

Oh, Cuba. Why didn't you let Boat Trip be rock bottom?


2) THE GAME PLAN: This trailer reminded me of an SNL short I saw once where they had a fake movie preview that employed all the Awful Movie Preview Cliches. Overused movie music. Punchline followed by a record scratch. You know what I mean. (Honestly. Watch them both. they both have James Brown music. They both have a jump cut to a wannabe catch-phrase "hell-low!" It's ridiculous.)

Anyway, this movie trailer looks like a joke. (Seriously, how many times in one preview can you abruptly start/stop the music and zoom in on somebody's face for a punchline? Oh? Ten? Ten is the number? Thank you.) And what's worse, this trailer uses the remix of the Elvis tune Rubberneckin ... which leads me to:


3) FRED CLAUS: As tired as the "Santa Claus is just a regular guy with regular problems" movie plot has become, this movie might actually not be bad. Vince Vaughn and Paul Giamatti don't suck. And this other preview doesn't look awful.

But the thing is the trailer they showed before the Simpsons Movie looked like it had been cut by the same people that did The Game Plan trailer. Right down to the part where they USE THE RUBBERNECKIN REMIX IN THE BACKGROUND. For God sakes, Hollywood. Get a new CD. And if you can't, at least don't put these two trailers on RIGHT NEXT TO EACH OTHER. It just makes the moviegoer angry. It makes the moviegoer feel like they are being treated as stupid saps that would go see anything you put on a screen. And then they have to go home and blog about it. And really, Hollywood, that's a lose-lose for both of us.